The importance of practicing what you preach

I have recently been reflecting on the impact of using clichés like “people are at the heart of everything we do.” We have all worked for or are aware of companies that use these kinds of phrases. You don’t have to search very hard on social media to find people mocking these statements, or even further, cautioning that they represent a red flag for an organization that should be avoided like the plague as a prospective employer. And this “authenticity gap” is often felt more strongly by leaders in human resources.

But why is this? Obviously on their faces, these statements should theoretically be attributes of a positive organizational culture. However, it is more common that the perception is that these sorts of cliches are actually cover for something more rotten underneath the surface.

While I understand this thinking (and also don’t necessarily disagree in many cases), it is actually possible for good leaders to put people at the heart of how they lead. I have worked for some great human beings that truly care about their people as much as they care about results, but not in a way that sacrifices them or reduces the leader’s effectiveness at delivering for their organization.

“Putting people at the heart of everything we do” (and statements like this) are powerful; however, their power can either be positive OR negative. So, if you’re a leader who earnestly wants to be human focused, how do you avoid this?

The Michael Scott trap: likability vs. accountability

One of the biggest challenges of leadership is straddling the line between being liked and being respected. What do I mean by this? Let’s think about Michael Scott from everyone’s favourite workplace comedy, The Office, who once said “Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.” While Michael Scott is a caricature, his “love me at all costs” philosophy manifests in real boardrooms every day.

As leaders, it can be tempting not to deal with a difficult situation due to a fear of how our people will react. But being respected as a leader is not about avoiding challenging situations – it’s about handling them in a way that is conscious of the fears, anxieties, challenges and other feelings that impacted people might be experiencing. And not acknowledging these feelings can actually lead employees to feel like their worst fears have been confirmed, whether they are factually correct or not. People fill in the empty space with their own explanations – “if they aren’t talking about the layoffs, what else are they hiding?”

Michael eventually became a (somewhat) respected leader later in his development in The Office when he stopped trying to be liked at any cost and focused more on doing the right thing even when it was hard.

Focusing on the process and the outcome

Senior leaders (both within and outside of HR) must regularly make very difficult decisions that will certainly be unpopular. Sometimes the right thing to do in the circumstances may still be disliked because every realistic option will be unfavourable in the eyes of those impacted. Think of, for example, necessary organizational restructuring that will negatively impact people regardless of how it’s done.

However, if you think of the process to get to the outcome instead of just the unpopular outcome, believe it or not, you can still possibly have people respect the decision and, ultimately, you. Being open and honest about the decision, why it was made, and what to expect can go a long way with gaining understanding.

To the extent possible, letting people be part of the decision can also help. Examples include “How would you like me to message this impact?” or “While we are reassigning you to another project, we’d be happy to let you decide if you move to project A vs. project B”.

If it makes sense in the circumstances, you could also consider bringing people into the decision-making process before the decision is made. As an example: “This is what we are trying to do – do you have ideas on how we could achieve the same thing in a different way?” In this case, you might truly get a new idea you hadn’t considered. Or, alternatively, if the idea can’t be used, you have an opportunity to explain why not while showing that you considered it in earnest. You must still tread lightly because asking for someone’s opinion and then not taking it (even if you considered it) also requires closing the feedback loop.

To summarize:

In an “outcome only” approach:

• Decisions are delivered as a final decision.
• Feedback is ignored or not sought.

In a “process and outcome” approach:

• Logic and "the why" are shared early and often.
• Feedback loops are closed, even if ideas aren't used.

Returning to the earlier point about being liked – this should not be thought of as merely a strategy to not be disliked. Leading this way whenever you can will build a level of respect in your organization where people want to stand behind and beside you and where they will trust that if you made a difficult decision, you must have had good reasons to do so. They will want to rally around you and help you wherever they can.

Leadership is a skill and even for those it comes naturally to, we must continue to work at it to remain effective.

Putting yourself in other people’s shoes

Although this seems intuitive, to successfully lead with humanity, you must be able to see things from other perspectives. This goes beyond just whether a decision will be well-liked or not.

This is where leading consistently in line with the above comes into play. When employees hear information from leadership, they are evaluating it. However, they are not just evaluating it on the basis of the words that you are saying in that moment, but also based on your previous words and behaviours and if they think you are trustworthy. Again, this seems intuitive, but are you aware of all of the moments when you are being evaluated? 

Do you stop and think about what people might be thinking each time you speak in a meeting? Every time you give news or new information? Because, your people are watching and evaluating you each and every time you have a touchpoint with them. There’s no such thing as an “innocent status update”. Is what you said consistent with your prior statements? Are you avoiding addressing an elephant in the room? What was your tone of voice?

Perception in difficult times

The way you are perceived in difficult times will be decided by these other touchpoints and less impactful moments. They will decide if people think you are honest and authentic.

Take the time to carefully consider all the ways you are being evaluated, and in what situations so that you can take care to make conscious decisions about how those various situations are addressed. Stop and think about the situations that make you consider and judge your own leader’s intentions and you will quickly realize how many elements form your opinion.

If we don’t understand our employees – especially our most talented ones – it is a real cost to the organization to not retain the best and brightest. While it is complicated and difficult, it should be possible, more often than not, to lead this way without incurring any cost. Who doesn’t want positive business outcomes without spending extra money?

Employee experience will not be decided by fancy meditation programs offered by employers, or pizza parties for getting through another year. It will more likely be decided by what an employee’s direct manager does day-to-day, and especially when the going gets rough. If we don’t get this right, little else will truly matter in terms of an employee deciding whether an employee believes that “people are the heart of everything (you) do.”

Matt Hopkins is the Executive Director, People, at the Toronto Transit Commission.