HR guessed 6 percent of men take leave to care for family, but employees said 71 percent
Ask HR who takes leave to care for a sick parent or spouse, and the likely answer is women. Employees tell a different story.
New research from The Standard, a Portland, Oregon-based insurance and financial services company, found that HR decision-makers believe 60 percent of women and just 6 percent of men take leave to care for a loved one’s physical health. Employees reported 48 percent of women and 71 percent of men.
The October 2026 report, Leave Perception by Gender: What HR Isn’t Seeing About Absence for Women and Men, surveyed 509 HR decision-makers and 501 employees through two third-party research firms in early 2026. The employee survey is self-reported and the sample is relatively small, so the numbers are best read as directional. The Standard also sells group disability, paid family leave and absence management services. Its release says the findings suggest that assumptions about gender and caregiving may keep employers from communicating and directing absence benefits effectively.
Where HR’s estimates and employee reports split
The caregiving gap is the widest, but it isn’t the only one. For an employee’s own physical health, HR estimated that 34 percent of women and 14 percent of men take leave. Employees reported 23 percent of women and 27 percent of men.
Mental health leave tells a similar story for women. HR believed 44 percent of women take it, and only 5 percent of women said they had. HR’s guess for men, 9 percent, landed much closer to the 13 percent men reported.
The picture isn’t uniform, and the definition of leave matters. The Standard’s own 2025 research asked about leaves of a month or more and found that 53 percent of women and 47 percent of men had taken one.
Why HR may be working with blind spots
Part of the problem is the paper trail. The report notes that personal health leave tied to a disability claim leaves cleaner records than caregiving leave, which can draw on Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) entitlements, state paid family and medical leave programs, paid time off and employer-granted leave, and often gets coded under broad categories.
HR may be missing other numbers, too. HRD reported that most health-related productivity loss never shows up in absence records, according to Vitality’s 2026 index.
The stakes are climbing. Sparrow, a leave management technology vendor, reported in its 2026 benchmark that caregiver leave claims rose 150 percent between 2020 and 2026, and that the median length of those leaves nearly quadrupled, from 12.5 days to 49.5 days. Sparrow’s figures come from its own customers, so they describe the employers it serves.
What the parental leave numbers show
The report found that HR believes 88 percent of women and 1 percent of men take leave for pregnancy or to bond with a new child. Employees reported 33 percent of women and 22 percent of men. That means HR overstated women’s use by 55 points and understated men’s by 21.
How a manager answers a leave request can carry legal weight. HRD covered a lawsuit alleging a TD Bank manager rejected a mental health request with the words “we don’t do accommodations.” The worker alleges she was later fired over FMLA leave, and the claims have not been tested in court.
What HR can do with the numbers
The Standard’s release says HR executives should evaluate leave strategies with workforce data and not assumptions about who needs or uses certain benefits. It adds that treating leave as a benefit for everyone may help employees of all genders get support and career growth.
For most teams, that starts with a look at the materials employees actually see. Enrollment guides, manager toolkits and benefits portals may speak to mothers and ignore fathers who need the same leave. Communication gaps carry a price elsewhere in the benefits program, too. HRD reported that one in four enrolled employees leave supplemental benefits unclaimed, according to Nayya’s review of 6.7 million medical claims.
Backup staffing plans deserve the same check. If they assume women are the primary caregivers, they may be planning around the wrong people.
“The story on leave for men and women isn’t what HR professionals think it is,” said Brad Yoder, assistant vice president of life, supplemental and disability claims at The Standard.
